Well, my year started really good. Blessings come my way. I am still working at my dream school. I still love my wiggly first graders. My baby is already 8 months old! Everything is going well but..
The realities of US life hit me. It is not easy to live in this part of the world. California has high cost of living. Most of my earnings just go to bills - rent, car insurance, internet, phone provider, power, gas for both our apartment and car, etc. It's a lot! Though I am earning well at my school, I wonder why it's still just enough. Alex and I were earning way less than what we earn now when we just started as husband and wife but we still cannot save the money we always aim for. I have to stay in my 2nd job which is tutoring K-8 students. I have 4 employers who gave me students within 10 miles my zip code. I am blessed my full-time job ends at 3pm (one of the many perks of being a teacher!) and so I still have time during the day to earn more on the side. Well, Cinzia is already here and she entails expenses too. She has demands too. Plus, Alex and I get chiropractic care and dental care and these are another expense. Again, it is a lot! Plus, everyday when I get home, I still need to cook, feed Cinzia, do house chores, and clean the house. Again, it is a lot!
My stress level is high that I often bark at Alex for minute things. I guess I have not fully adjusted to the realities of the life here in the US. I am very futuristic, idealistic, and optimistic. But sometimes the goings-on wear me down. It is hard.
In the Philippines, I can hire a helper to help me clean the house. I do not need a car to go around. I have my parents to, maybe, help me take care of Cinzia. The beach is just a stone's throw away. Vacation getaways are just there. Friends just meet anytime to chat, just to chat, and it was fun. Here you cannot easily go on vacations and meet friends. Everything and everyone is far.
Sigh*
God, please give me a peace of mind. You brought me here in the US for a reason. We have come this far together. We can overcome this too together, right?
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