My principal said, October is an "I lost it" month for teachers. I think it is true because for many reasons, I lose 'em.
As a mom
Cinzia is 8 now, and she is hooked to electronics. She likes listening to K-pop music and playing Roblox. Because her self-control is not that manageable yet, she tends to get addicted to it. I lost it one morning because she ignored my instructions to put her shoes on and brush her teeth so we could leave to school. There were lots of yelling and screaming that morning. I felt guilty after the incident. She cannot have electronics for 2 weeks as a consequence. I am also reading a book that I bought years ago that is a practical help for me as a mom. I already cried while reading the first 5 pages. I will be better.
As a student
I am actually a Doctoral student, and I sometimes forget about it because it is not at the top of my priority. I do not even have the best of grades. I am taking one course every quarter. My adviser called me early this week to discuss my future. She said, after I complete my current course, I am actually going to take my Prospectus class, and based on my past grades, I should have an A or B. Otherwise, I will not be able to move on to my Capstone, which is my final step before graduation. I am going to work harder. I am almost at the finish line.
As a teacher
This week has been tough actually. My patience and credibility as a teacher has been tested. Teaching at a public school is hard. There are so many expectations, and liability is really high. I have to be proactive and strategic in everything - supervising kids, implementing my lesson plans, talking to my students, etc. I feel like I am a police office everyday. I have to stay alert all the time.
Recently, a situation about reciting the Pledge of Allegiance has been brought up. I am still bothered with it. I need to talk to our Assistant Principal about it on Monday.
As a daughter
It is my heart's utmost desire to live separately from my parents. My goal is to buy a property with a guest house at the back for them. I need my privacy, my kitchen, my living room, my space. My friends say this is a normal feeling. The Bible even does not recommend living with your parents while married. True. I am praying I will be able to buy that ideal property sooner than later.
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So "in Jesus' name, I press on."
